1997 Fools: Department of Justice drops suit against Microsoft
Subject: Department of Justice drops suit against Microsoft
From: "James A. Whitney" <jwhitn1@uic.edu.nospam>
Date: 1997/04/01
Message-Id: <33414AE2.5C47@uic.edu.nospam>
Newsgroups: comp.sys.mac.advocacy
SEATTLE, April 1: The Federal Department of Justice decided today
to drop its suit against Microsoft. Several software companies,
most notably Corel, were outraged at the decision.
At the heart of the issue is the processor utilization inherent
in Microsoft's new Windows 98 operating system. According to
charges by Corel, programs that do not identify themselves to
the system as "Microsoft Acceptable" are allocated at most one
out of every ten processor cycles.
A high level Corel exec stated, "It makes it like you're running
a 386 instead of a 200 Mhz Pentium."
Microsoft has never denied the policy. According to one manager,
"There's nothing wrong with using our operating system to leverage
our applications in the market. If other companies don't like it,
they can either move to markets that we don't want, or they can
code their programs for other operating systems, like OS/2, the
Mac OS,..." (ed: at this point the manager succumbed to a fit
of laughter).
The Department of Justice found Microsoft's arguments compelling,
adding that, "the companies involved assured their own problems
designing applications for an operating system owned by a company
with competing applications. The Department of Justice found that
there was really no case to be made."
Macintosh advocate George G. observed, "It was really the only way
Microsoft could make their apps run at speeds comparable to other
companies' apps."
James W. added, "It's gotta be an April Fools joke."
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