1997 Fools: 17mm format to replace 16mm format
Subject:      17mm format to replace 16mm format
From:         bihari@ohstpy.mps.ohio-state.edu
Date:         1997/04/01
Message-Id:   <1997Apr1.084558.10330@ohstpy>
Newsgroups:   rec.arts.movies.production

I just heard that Kodak has invented a new 17mm film format to replace both
16mm and super 16mm.  The new format does not use any sprocket holes since
sprocket holes tend to cause to much air pressure to build up inside a
camera.  Kodak has invented a special epoxy which they will use (in the short
term) to fill in the sprocket holes on existing stock.  Then that stock will
be placed in special ovens fitted with a stretching device that will convert
their 16mm film to 17mm film.  All 16mm cameras will need to be junked as
a proper conversion to 17mm is not feasible, but a spokesman for Kodak said
that it will be worth it since the film will be much better in all respects.
The camera manufacturers (Aaton, Arri etc.) will be working together to make
just one model of 17mm camera for all uses.  The 1997 model will be bright
green, weigh in at about 50 pounds and be available with a turret with two
primary lenses and one zoom lens permanantly attached.  (The prime lenses
will be 5.5mm and 8mm and the zoom will go from 90mm to 120mm.) The name of this
new camera will be the "SLOOF LIRPA" and 1997 model will be on sale by Feb 29
of 1998 for only $66,666.  That's all I've heard about the new film format
and camera.  I'm sure someone out there has more information on the subect,
but he/she is likely much more mature or too busy to go typing up April Fools
stuff like this.  I'm so very, very, very sorry.  I don't know what came over